Princess Shan

Every little girl wants to be a princess. When you grow up this doesn't change but you just don't tell anyone. Girls love dressing up and being told they look pretty. I feel like there is nothing wrong with this...however, for most women I know this is a real struggle...the desire to look beautiful. We spend hours getting ready, stare in every mirror we walk past, compare ourselves to others, go on crazy diets, and then in the end we are left feeling inadequate anyway. I have heard a saying that I think is very true, "Vanity is to women, what lust is to men". It doesn't help that so many people promote this ideal, one no one could ever reach.

I feel like I used to be a fairly confident person. Then someone I cared about deeply told me that I wasn't good enough, that I wasn't pretty enough, that I wasn't skinny enough, my hair wasn't long enough...blah, blah, blah. But I listened to this person, as they tore me down time and time again. This has lead to the ultimate destruction of my self esteem. I am currently working to rebuild what this person destroyed. It makes me sad too because I have realized that true beauty cannot be attained through make-up and your dress size. It's something more, something on the inside. There is a song by Bethany Dillon and I think she puts it best. She talks about what most women tell themselves:

I want to be beautiful
Make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart,
and be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
Just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful.....

Then she talks about how true beauty is found on the inside, it comes from God. I know so many women who have such beautiful hearts for God, it shines in everything they do. It can be seen in the love they have, in their actions and speech, they are truly stunning. I want to be one of these women, whose love for God and others is so powerful and beautiful that it can't help but to be noticed. The second part of the song by Bethany Dillon says this:

You make me beautiful
You make me stand in awe
You step inside my heart, and I am amazed
I love to hear You say
Who I am is quite enough
You make me worthy of love and beautiful

God is the one who gives our life meaning, He makes us beautiful, He makes us worthy of love. If we look for beauty else where, we are surely to be disappointed. It's not worth it to lose oneself to attain the kind of beauty that will eventually fade. The world may give praise for outward appearance but if there is no beauty in our hearts then we will truly feel insufficient. And those who are so critical and judge only by the out-word appearance are not worth our time, they are fools. This is what I am learning.